Since the advent of mix tapes, the goal with them has always been to try to describe very complicated emotions you're feeling through the words and music of others. If you're trying to profess your love or admiration to a person, that's a complicated and thought-provoking thing to have to do! If you're trying to turn on a younger sibling, cousin or friend onto new music, especially when they're at an impressionable age, that's a huge responsibility! You have the power to change this young person's life through music. Same goes for band mates. Illustrating the type of music you'd like to make with others is a complex form of communication. And alas, there's the last type of mix - the one no one ever wants to make. The break-up mix.
I don't want to delve too personally into my own situation or what exactly transpired to inspire the below playlist. But I will say that I was involved with a person, on and off for the majority of last year. Several months after we/she called it quits, I woke up to a text a few weeks back that read, "I saw you in a dream last night." The conversation that unfolded could've gone a number of ways, but it ended with her texting me in a 'by the way' kind of manner, "I'm engaged. I'm getting married."
I immediately retreated to my iTunes library to find solace. I started playing the Taking Back Sunday track "Your Own Disaster" from the Live From Orensanz CD over and over and over again. It's amazing how quickly our feelings can turn. When we part ways with someone for whatever reason, the least we can hope for is that we're thought of fondly. All the negatives are washed away and all that's left are the good times you shared with that person. In other words, you hope you're not forgotten. And yet, moments after that final text, I just kept thinking of the lyric, "just forget me. It's that simple." It's interesting how sometimes, in order to feel better about things, your mind starts working in fascinating, inexplicable ways. I, of course, started collecting a tally of songs to make me feel better about the whole situation. And much like any relationship/break-up itself, it's filled with contradictions, it's filled with doses of self loathing, anger, regret, romanticism, disappointment, etc. Here's what I put together on initial instinct.
The Great Heartbreak Of 2013-2014 Mix:
1. You Just Haven't Earned It Yet, Baby by The Smiths
2. Push by The Cure
3. Love Will Tear Us Apart by Joy Division
4. Why Bother? by Weezer
5. Someday by The Strokes
6. Wicked Game by Chris Isaak
7. Shout by Tears For Fears
8. Heartbreak Hotel by Elvis Presley
9. Landslide by Smashing Pumpkins
10. Stuck On You by Failure
11. I Remember You by Skid Row
12. Your Own Disaster by Taking Back Sunday (Live From Orensanz version)
13. Without You Here (Live) by Finch (from 'What It Is To Burn X')
14. So Long by Guster
15. They're Not Horses, They're Unicorns by Bayside
16. Jude Law And A Semester Abroad by Brand New
17. I Hate Everything About You by Three Days Grace
With a little bit more time to think about it, I would've added or used some different tracks, such as Roxette's "It Must Have Been Love" or EG Daily's "One Way Love (Better Off Dead)," but I already used that on my 80's mix. Maybe "Comfortable Liar" by Chevelle. But I always think that your initial reaction is the right one, so I'm sticking with this. And as you'll note, the tracks, lyrics and messages from this mix are just as mixed as most relationships tend to be. I blame myself at first with The Smith's "You Just Haven't Earned It Yet, Baby," and yet a few songs later, I'm declaring "Why Bother?" to the tune of Weezer. "You say you want to be by my side, darling your head's not right," from The Strokes "Someday" is again me taking the blame. Where in Tears For Fears "Shout," "I'd really love to break your heart." The Cure's "Push" is probably the most accurate of the bunch in terms my own situation. Or maybe "Wicked Game" is. I don't know. Things get a bit on the mean side towards the end, but like I said before, anger is a natural coping mechanism when it comes to a relationship that's run it's course. So gotta follow it through. Even if it means putting a song by Three Days Grace on a mix, something I thought I'd never, ever do.
Like I said, all of the above happened several weeks ago and I've been processing it all by listening to this mix I made. And I love it. It's a great collection of songs that currently encapsulate the varied range of emotions I've been going through. I'm good now. So back to the grind. But before I go, I'll leave you with another one I should have put on this mix. Coheed & Cambria's "A Favor House Atlantic," mainly for it's beautiful, melodic & catchy lyric, "Bye, Bye, beautiful. Don't bother to write..." So I'll include this really terrific acoustic version of that song here. And I'll say it once more...
Bye, bye, beautiful. Don't bother to write.
